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Thursday, December 5, 2013

Hope Written


 
I cannot help but let myself get carried away in questions to God..
Why me, God?
Two months ago I truly felt blogging was coming to an end.
 
I was going to close this chapter of my life.
 
And if I was being really honest it was partially because I wanted to be released from an obligation.

It is like running. If someone makes me run, I hate it...but on my own terms I can run forever...

Fortunately, something compelled me to keep writing.
and I am very thankful...
 
Last week I was sitting in my car when my phone went off.
I had received an email.

It was titled, "'Bleed", and I did not think much of it until I started reading the message.

I was instantly captivated by the words.
As I continued to read, I felt an overwhelming emotion....

The email was from a reader ..
She had discovered my page just by googling 'beautifully broken'.
....
It is times like these that I do not believe in coincidence.
....
It spoke to me.
It pierced my heart..
in a good way.
She shared with me her story...
and she blew me away with her sweet words.
She spoke of heartache, of hurt, of disappoint,
but most importantly,
of Hope.

It was by far one of the most heartfelt letters I have read.
She might not know this, but it encouraged me to continue writing.
I want to thank her for this,
and for opening her heart.


 I do not know the intimate details of her journey,
but I felt honored to see a little into her life.

I could not help but feel close to her.

..To feel understanding and relate in a way maybe not all can.
...and that is when it hit.

I constantly question God, "Why me? Why this?"
But in one email I understood.

Relation.

I can relate to her on a level that I could not have 5 years ago.
 I found my answer..
it was there, in black in white,
staring back at me in The Email.

It was Hope written.

And I realize the answer has been there all along..
My answer is in the heartfelt emails from readers.
My answer is in the letters of testimony shared with me.
My answer is in the conversations with friends...
who too have suffered and then found
a Hope that we can only understand.

We can all feel a togetherness...
and know,
we are not alone.

I hope more can see,
what this reader saw.
The rainbow after the storm.

And this is
my Hope, written.
 

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