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Thursday, November 14, 2013

Bleed. {Part 1}

Why Does My Heart Feel So Bad by Moby on Grooveshark

There was a moment in time when my motivation to get up every morning was the hope my dream would become a reality. I once believed in this hope, but I lost it.

This weekend I spent the Veterans Holiday with some of my most cherished veterans in my life, officers of the United States Air Force.

The sun once shined on days when I lived and breathed with the most beautiful of dreams.

This weekend was bittersweet. Memories were made with my dear friends, but old, hurtful memories filled my head.
The wounds of my heartache from two years ago, when I was given the news my military dream was over, reopened. The hurt came rushing back in as I visited Offutt AFB once again. I started to bleed as I was reminded.

{You can read I HAD A DREAM...A LITTLE OF MY STORY by clicking the post on the side of the page, if you have not already..It may give you a peek into my journey with the AF.}

This weekend, I was reminded of my passion for the military. I was reminded of my desire to serve along these men and women. I was reminded of how strong my heart bled to become one of them.

I honestly had forgotten how hurt I had once felt. I thought I was over it, but I am not. I wish I could say I am, but the human in me cries.

I once believed.

I believed my dreams could happen. I believed in myself. And the most greatest belief, I believed that God would make my dreams take flight.

I wish I still did.

Instead I continue to bleed.

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